I’ve been described as many things, in my time. I’ve remembered the compliments that knocked me sideways and the comparisons that make me smile.

I’ve tried to forget the words that have hurt me, unless they’ve contained something I’ve needed to learn.

Yesterday, following an outwardly-calm inwardly-fraught 40 minutes waiting for an ultrasound after my consultant thought he detected something wicked in my left breast, I heard two words I’ll treasure forever.

“It’s nothing,” he said, “you’re just naturally lumpy.”

Naturally lumpy! In another context, friends, I’d have put on my clothes and left.

(Well, actually, that’s exactly what I did, but you know what I mean.)

All is well. Lumpy, naturally, but well.